|
"whoopee cushion" "Youngstown" + "blog" "Catholicism" + "weird" "stoopie" + "grocery" "Caccati in mano e prenditi a schiaffi!"
Send e-flowers or blow e-raspberries here.Guestbook courtesy SignMyGuestbook.com |
2005-04-20 - 9:46 p.m. Today is Big Dirty Stinking Mood Day. It didn't help that they started jackhammering a nearby street at 7:30 this morning. (On the plus side, I did get out the door half an hour earlier than usual.) And there was crud in the tub when I went to get a shower. My roommates are anal-rententive about a number of things, just not rinsing the tub or clearing the drain of hairballs. This pisses me off much more than it should. And when I went into the kitchen the trash can smelled like something had died in it, which, in today's unseasonable heat, lent a swampy air to that end of the house. And I am leaving this apartment by June 1, which means there are things to do to fill the vacancy. I want nothing to do with it, so instead of saying "I want nothing to do with this," or "Someone else needs to be in charge of this," or "God fucking dammit, there is no reason for ME to spend time meeting these people, I'm not going to have anything to do with them other than giving them some of my furniture if they could use it," I am going to spend my days giving myself heart attacks about it until the room is taken. And of course I am worried now that maybe I am sad and unable to get anything of much use completed because I am now unmedicated. I took my last pill last Wednesday morning. CrazyMeds says it takes 7 to 8 days for all of the stuff to get out of your system. So now every moment is my own. Every Big Long Cry, every time I want to drop everything and call someone, every time I fly off the handle because of some stupid house thing, they are all mine now. Now I am really, really crazy. Or it could just be that today was hot and I wasn't dressed for it, and oh yeah, I spent from Wednesday to Monday sleeping, eating, and reading Bloom County cartoons, so of course getting back to work is going to feel overwhelming and suck ass. And what I'm really worrying about is all the work I have to do in order to pass everything else. Not the trash can, or the shower drain, or the precise wording of the Craig's List ad, or the stupid comment I overheard someone make that is eating at me.
|